By
Obododimma Oha
I am one of those who like free things: free email account,
free Twitter account, free Facebook wall, free e-book, free this and free that.
In my Igbo culture, it is considered unwise for a person to spit out a juicy
morsel when encountering it in the mouth! Ask Chinua Achebe the novelist. A juicy morsel and not a bony one!
That person spitting out a juicy morsel must have some madness disturbing him
or her. But I am not mad or would not want to be regarded as "mad."
So, I like things labelled "free."
But such "free" things may possess and hide a hook
somewhere! So, I need to be very careful o! Imagine information technology
offering these many free things. It's suspicious! Many Apps, for instance, come
as "free"! Is this a temptation? One is almost being begged to
install them! There must be something about free things that information
technology has not told me! Free, indeed.
Is the free service not spying and stealing vital
information? Is web-based free service profiling me and exposing when and how I
tell lies? Is Twitter exposing how I tweet out my mind
second-by-second and monitoring my heart beat and blood pressure? Free tweets and free Unoka wall and hiring
the town-crier of email without bothering to pay a minimum wage to the poor
fellow!
Free scribble for Chinua Achebe's character, Unoka, on his
wall whenever he is owing people and cannot pay back. Free bottle of beer for
that indigent fellow acting his role in a Nollywood film. Yes; free lunch and
free bon appetit!
Look, there is no
free lunch anywhere, whether at a wedding that you have not been invited to or at a
house-warming party. There is no free lunch. It is all, as Patty Obassey would
say in one of his songs, a case of “weta isi bia were isi” (Bring a head (for
ritual) and have a head)! But one giver who has a hidden agenda pretends that
it is all free. Yes; it is all free, including the one who believes blatant the lie!
Bring a head and have a head-way to vomit all your wherebouts, your bank
savings, your new dress, as well as your relatives and friends! It is all free
for submission of self.
But nobody
needs to scream it that you need to tread cautiously, instead of just plunging
blindly into the murky pool.
Those of us
who have gone for fishing before know the strategy very well. “Use a very
tempting bait.” An irresistible bait, like a free service, would do, what more when
it pretends to be making life simpler for you! Think of holding the whole wide
world in your hands or being able to reach the whole world at a punch of a key!
If the free
service ceases after getting hold of your life, you only have to think of
committing suicide. Your whole life is in that free thing, or you have started
believing that the strange new world that includes you is about having free
things. Everything free! Imagine!
From electronic album to free publishing space! Even free advertisement and catalogue of meetings. Freedom could be boundless, especially with the possibility of abusing it built in. Actually you cannot only place your business there, but also homestead or spy there!Are you not already in virtual life? Why not a virtual exile therefore? Also, the Web can spy better for you. Remember: you can see and ensnare that reckless fellow easily!
Some were
born to spend sleepless nights in their laboratories trying to invent something
that would be distributed free-of-charge, while others were born to enjoy what
others invented and could give free. Are some not supposed to be carried on the
back forever, being big babies, and others to suffer for them?
My dear, do
not look for free things; rather, look for the hidden idea to make them appear
free. Free things could come with very high costs sometimes!
Now, let us
return to the beginning. I like free things. No sweating. I will sweat later. I
could even cry. It is all about discovering those who hardly think in this
world and using them without them knowing.
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